They just can’t help themselves, can they? Michelle Obama, former First Lady, multimillionaire, global celebrity, Netflix producer, and keynote speaker to the world’s most elite—wants you to know she’s just like you. That is, if “you” are also tired of being ignored while flying commercial, rocking a ballcap, and quietly weeping about how no one appreciates your suffering. Welcome to the Left’s latest spiritual discipline: Elite Victimhood™.
Michelle Missed Her Applause Break—So Now She’s Hurt
In a clip from her podcast, Michelle bemoans the fact that people don’t recognize her in public anymore. Why? Because, she says, they’re “trapped by their phones.” Not because, say, the cult of Obama worship has faded or people are busy trying to survive under Democrat-run policies. Nope. It’s definitely the phones. She claims she can walk by undetected, just a “Black woman in a cap.”
People are waking up. The Obamas—once treated like royalty—aren’t the saviors they pretended to be. And now that the cameras are pointed elsewhere, Michelle wants us all to feel bad that the curtain has closed.
Flying Coach and Suffering in Silence (With a Netflix Deal)
Michelle laments that she flies commercial, as if this is some kind of penance for her years in the White House. Can we get her a medal for bravery? According to her, it’s all about “articulating pain.” And if only we understood her pain, we’d care more. Oh, we understand. We just don’t buy it.
The Narcissist’s Therapy Session, Now Streaming
Michelle, who was literally the most celebrated woman on Earth for a decade, is now asking why people don’t care about her struggles. Here’s a thought: maybe it’s hard for regular Americans—who are dealing with inflation, crime, border chaos, and cultural rot—to empathize with someone who’s more likely to sip wine on Oprah’s lawn than stand in line at the DMV.
This is the Democrat blueprint—turn power into pain, luxury into struggle, and every inconvenience into oppression. And when you’re out of real things to say, just talk about your “emotional labor” and how hard it is to be a woman. Especially when that woman is married to a guy who’s still peddling the “very fine people” hoax and dividing the country every time he opens his mouth.
From First Lady to First World Problems
Let’s be clear: Michelle skipped Trump’s inauguration and now frames it as a heroic act of self-care. She says she’s “owning her life” and making “the choices that are right for me”—as if that decision deserves a Netflix docuseries. Then she drops the line that women are “shock absorbers”—for their husbands, their children, their families. Give me a break. This wasn’t a factory worker talking. It’s someone who’s been massaged by the political and media machine for decades. It’s PR therapy in podcast form.
2028? No Thanks
The cherry on top is that some Democrats still float Michelle Obama as a possible 2028 presidential candidate. Seriously? She’s not out there fighting like Trump. She’s not building anything. She’s not dismantling corrupt systems. She’s being coddled by the very machine Trump’s been battling for years—and still somehow painting herself as the underdog. This is the inversion the Left wants: The pampered are persecuted. The adored are oppressed. The queens want to be martyrs.
Final Thoughts
Michelle Obama had everything—fame, money, adoration, a media halo—and now she wants tears because her pain hasn’t been “articulated” enough. There is no brave, struggling everywoman here. There’s just a deeply privileged elite who misses the spotlight and is doing what Democrats do best: rewriting reality to make themselves the victim. The truth is simple: we don’t need another sob story from someone who already had the best seat in the house. We need leaders who know the difference between real hardship and Hollywood hardship.
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JIMMY
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