Parenting can be challenging, especially when it comes to disciplining your children. We all want our kids to listen to us without resorting to scolding or punishment. That’s why behavior experts and experienced parents warn against playing a particular game with your kids – the “Are you gonna stop me?” game.
The Pitfalls of the “Are You Gonna Stop Me?” Game
Behavior Analyst and father-of-four, [Name], cautions parents about the negative consequences of playing the “Are you gonna stop me?” game with their children. While it may seem like harmless fun, this game can lead to disobedience and frustration. The expert advises parents to avoid this game altogether and opt for more effective strategies.
According to [Name], children perceive the “Are you gonna stop me?” game as fun, while parents find it infuriating. This discrepancy in perception can create a power struggle between parents and children, resulting in behavioral issues. Instead of engaging in this game, parents should focus on redirection as a key strategy to encourage positive behavior in their children.
The Power of Redirection
Redirection involves diverting a child’s attention from undesirable behavior to a more appropriate activity. By redirecting their attention, parents guide their children towards positive choices without resorting to scolding or punishment. This technique not only helps in the immediate situation but also teaches children valuable coping skills and emotional regulation.
Simple and Effective Redirection Techniques
Experts at the Children’s Lighthouse Early Learning school emphasize the importance of redirecting behavior to teach children alternative coping mechanisms. Here are some simple and effective redirection techniques that parents can employ:
1. Distract with Engaging Activities
When you notice your child about to engage in undesirable behavior, distract them with engaging activities. For example, if they are about to throw a tantrum, show them a colorful toy or ask them about their favorite storybook. By redirecting their attention, you can prevent negative behavior and foster a positive environment.
2. Introduce Novelty and Surprises
Children are naturally curious, and introducing novelty can redirect their attention effectively. Bring out a new puzzle, board game, or art supplies to capture their interest. Surprise them with a fun activity or a spontaneous outing. These unexpected experiences can replace negative behavior with excitement and engagement.
3. Encourage Decision-Making
Giving children choices can redirect their focus and empower them to make positive decisions. For example, instead of saying, “Don’t touch that,” offer options like, “Do you want to play with your building blocks or read a book?” This way, children feel in control and are more likely to redirect their attention to a more desirable activity.
4. Redirect through Play
Play is a powerful tool for redirection. Engage your child in imaginative play or physical activities that capture their interest. For example, if they are about to grab a forbidden object, initiate a game of hide-and-seek or have a race in the backyard. Redirecting their energy towards play not only distracts them from negative behavior but also fosters bonding and creativity.
5. Teach Emotional Awareness
Redirecting behavior can also involve teaching children about their emotions and appropriate ways to express them. When you notice your child becoming upset or frustrated, help them identify their emotions and provide alternatives for expressing themselves. For example, teach them deep breathing techniques or encourage them to draw or write about their feelings.
The Benefits of Redirection
By implementing redirection techniques, you can experience several benefits in your parenting journey. Here are a few advantages of using redirection instead of playing the counterproductive “Are you gonna stop me?” game:
- Positive Reinforcement: Redirection reinforces positive behavior and encourages children to make better choices.
- Enhanced Emotional Intelligence: Redirecting behavior provides an opportunity to teach children about their emotions and appropriate ways to express them.
- Improved Parent-Child Relationship: By engaging in redirective activities, parents can strengthen their bond with their children and create lasting memories.
- Cultivating Independence: Redirection empowers children to make their own decisions and develop problem-solving skills.
